{"id":61,"date":"2020-07-13T20:58:00","date_gmt":"2020-07-14T02:58:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thecornerlotauthors.com\/OlynOzbick\/?p=61"},"modified":"2021-02-12T12:39:32","modified_gmt":"2021-02-12T19:39:32","slug":"how-to-be-a-writer","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thecornerlotauthors.com\/OlynOzbick\/how-to-be-a-writer\/","title":{"rendered":"How To Be A Writer"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

By Olyn Ozbick<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

1) Take yourself as an author very seriously. To do this, you will have to quit all other work. It\u2019s important to get in touch with the transcendence of your particular creative genius.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

You can\u2019t do that standing behind a till, budgeting or planning conferences. Get real about your creativity \u2013 embrace your true being. Your manager has never understood your creative abilities, face it, she never will.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2) Now that you have no job, revel in that exciting leap you just took. Celebrate your new literary freedom by sleeping in. Creative genius needs time \u2013 particularly morning time. <\/h4>\n\n\n\n
\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

3) <\/strong>Don\u2019t bother getting dressed. PJ\u2019s are comfy \u2013 that\u2019s why you wear them to bed. Why would you approach your creative endeavours in anything but the most freeing of attire?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4) <\/strong>Drink. No not milk. It could take a little time to get up to speed. Start slowly with a little Bailey\u2019s in your morning coffee, wine at lunch and wine also at dinner. Once you get the hang of it you can start fortifying your wine drinking with a splash of scotch on ice. Soon you will be a true author, quaffing only whiskey morning noon and night. Well done! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

5) <\/strong>If you\u2019ve been taking writing classes, now\u2019s the time to drop them. Don\u2019t call the instructor to explain, you are too serious about your writing to waste time with petty scheduling issues, just stop showing up. If you have writer friends and colleagues, drop them too. You don\u2019t need their annoying input, they are completely wrong about your work \u2013 always have been! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

6) Stay in. Now that you are drinking day and night in your PJ\u2019s and have no jobs, friends or commitments, you are a true reclusive writer, well done! Keep it up!<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

7) <\/strong>Hone impatience. Real writers aren\u2019t patient, writers are driven. Get that first draft of your novel out the door as soon as possible. Don\u2019t wait until it\u2019s finished, it\u2019s brilliant \u2013 you know it, and the agent will know it as soon as it hits her in-box. If it needs a little work, she\u2019ll do it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

8)<\/strong> If the agent doesn\u2019t get back to you immediately, don\u2019t worry, she\u2019s probably trying to tie down your three-book deal first. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don\u2019t be afraid to call her and introduce yourself, she\u2019ll be delighted, after all, you are a brilliant writer and her career will skyrocket once she signs you, she\u2019s probably a bit intimidated to approach you first. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

9)<\/strong> Now\u2019s the time to leave the house. Celebrate with dinner at an expensive restaurant. Don\u2019t worry about the cost, put it on your visa! Soon your advance will arrive and later you will be rolling in royalty cheques. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Congratulations, and welcome to the wonderful world of Authoring!<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Take yourself as an author very seriously. To do this, you will have to quit all other work. It\u2019s important to get in touch with the transcendence of your particular creative genius. – Olyn Ozbick<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[4],"tags":[14,13,6,7,8],"class_list":["post-61","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-story","tag-how-to-be-a-writer","tag-humour","tag-olyn-ozbick","tag-the-corner-lot-authors","tag-writing","post-preview"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pcMwtG-Z","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thecornerlotauthors.com\/OlynOzbick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/61","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thecornerlotauthors.com\/OlynOzbick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thecornerlotauthors.com\/OlynOzbick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thecornerlotauthors.com\/OlynOzbick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thecornerlotauthors.com\/OlynOzbick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=61"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/thecornerlotauthors.com\/OlynOzbick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/61\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":85,"href":"https:\/\/thecornerlotauthors.com\/OlynOzbick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/61\/revisions\/85"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thecornerlotauthors.com\/OlynOzbick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=61"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thecornerlotauthors.com\/OlynOzbick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=61"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thecornerlotauthors.com\/OlynOzbick\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=61"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}